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A woman and a duck walk into a bar.


The bartender says, "Where'd you get the pig."


The woman says, "That's not a pig, that's a duck."


He says, "I was talking to the duck."




A guy walks into a bar and asks for ten shots of the establishments finest single malt scotch. The bartender sets him up, and the guy takes the first shot in the row and pours it on the floor. He then takes the last one in the and does the same. The bartender asks him, "Why did you do that?" And the guy replies, " Well the first shot always tastes like crap, and the last one always makes me sick!"




So.... a baby seal walked into a club...




So Jesus walks into a bar and says, "I'll just have a glass of water."




An Irishman walks by a bar... it could happen...




A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: "A beer please, and one for the road."





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